On deciding to leave NYC and return to Michigan, I had a plan – to finish open projects. That was a positive way of saying, let’s not start any new projects. I fancied how it might feel to get caught up and have plenty of closure, completion. Quixotically, I latched onto a new collaboration almost immediately! A month and a half later I’m happily back in my own sandbox. Mind, I also made progress on several unfinished projects, but it’s hilarious and intriguing that after getting excited about a reasonable course of action, I flowed my energy elsewhere. Somewhere there’s a scientist nodding, “But of course, your behavior validates my theory!”
Everything I do I do to get laid – that’s my theory. Somewhere in my head I linked up the possibility of getting laid with forsaking my own stuff, which mostly involves staring at screens for hours and days. That’s pretty clear, eh? Editing movies keeps me out of circulation and that’s the hitch, much as I love an elegant cut.
Ok, so maybe I’m not so complex. Gosh, that’s a relief. When I starting writing this post I fretted, “What a can of worms I’m opening here, this has got to be twisted shit about self sabotage and so on. Oh whoa as me!”
The answer is really quite obvious and sweet. Dan Kelly craves connection. How beautifully human.
Back to brass tacks, as they say. How’s the project finishing initiative going to jive with my beautifully human nature? The answer can be found in tai chi – balance. It’s no good to stare at screens only, I’ve got to have a life. There might be other unfinished projects that will get me out of the house. Perhaps some that will help me to meet cool people, a few of whom might be single women. Now you’re talking.
One of my “unfinished projects” happens to be tai chi. I started practicing 6 years ago, and now I’m 1000 miles away from my community. There is no finishing tai chi either, finishing is forever – a daily deepening of my practice. Master Ru says that practicing with other people is the way. Ru’s the bomb, btw. Rather than try and find another tai chi master in remote Northern Michigan, I’ve decided to teach what I already know. Week three of Operation Dive Deep is underway and I’m very pleased with the results. I’ve already got a couple of prodigies, I have to flow like water every day lest they catch me up!
My new tai chi community gets me out of the house twice a week. There’s also something about guiding a practice that feels great. I don’t have any illusions about my role, I am a facilitator and a conduit. I can show the forms and talk about how they make me feel, maybe I can even send a little energy here and there. All this adds up to teaching I guess and tho it’s a little scary to call myself a teacher, it’s a convenient shorthand. I felt both slightly guilty and thrilled yesterday when I realized that it’s a form of what players call social proof. At the root, I’m discovering what being a teacher actually means. It’s a spiritual hot seat. Whoo hoo!
To summarize, I returned to Michigan to complete unfinished projects and realized that having a balanced life is the essential project, and completion actually means attentive, consistent practice. Experiencing achievement and fun, concentration and emptiness, solitary and collaborative discovery, that’s the ticket.
More on unfinished projects (including DOG and Around Lake Michigan) and other reasons why I moved back to Michigan may or not be explored in future posts. Vote now!
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